Thanks Greg for reminding me of this one...
10/28/2006 7:53:01 PM - Dave Tate
An all time classic question. How cold are your balls?
This question was first asked to Martin on 9-27-01.
Martin,
Ok, you helped me out last time. Thanks. Kinda feel silly. I heard a friend tell me about a technique for squatting. He said icing your testicles helps raise your testosterone levels. I tried it and all that i got was an ice burn on my balls, and my squat went down five pounds. If it is true, should i ice after lifting? I iced befor i lifted last time. Thanks. Train hard and lift big weights. Ps. What is the financing option of weight releasers, say 36 months?
Here was Martin's answer...
Thank god your "friend" did not tell you about a technique involving getting kicked in the balls to kick start test production. I am not sure where your "friend" got the idea, but if it really worked, I feel you would see a lot more ice packs to nuts scenarios unfold at major meets.
There have been studies to show that extreme cold exposure can lead to increased growth hormone production, but you dont see many lifters swimming in Lake Michigan.
The moral of the story is that although it is good to try new things, you have to know where to draw the line before you sterilize yourself.
Now here was what I later posted....
After reading this I figured I had to give this a try.
You know I will try anything. So, I got a butter dish and filled it up with water and put and apple in the middle of it, then put it into the freezer overnight.
The next morning I cut the apple out and had a real nice hole just perfect to fit my Balls into. I figured this would be perfect. I could wear some loose shorts and pull myself out to the side and and place my bag in the dish as I drove to the gym. This way my test levels would be optimum when I arrived at the gym 45 minutes later. The dish worked perfect. While it hurt like hell in the beginning, the pain began to wear off with time.
Godsmack BLASTING over the speakers and gunning about 85 miles an hour, I knew once I got to the gym, the PR's would fall.
Who else would be doing this?
Could this be the edge I have been looking for the past 12 years? Well I ran into a bit of a traffic jam and got stuck next to a semi driver. The look in his face was of total shock. He had to be asking himself. Why in the hell does that big bald dude have his bag in a butter dish?
Fu*& him! I gotta squat!
Well the traffic jam kept me on ice for another 10 minutes. When I pulled into the parking lot I could actually feel the test building. I have not felt this much aggression since my wife ate all the HoHo's. When I stopped the car I figured it was time to pull my bag out and get in the gym.
Well do you all remember the kid in the movie "The Christmas Story" Yep my bag was froze to the butter dish.
Then it hit me, I had to walk into Westside Barbell Club with my bag frozen to a butter dish. I could see the look on Louie's face after I walked in the door holding my gym bag in one hand my belt in another and a butter dish attached to my bag.
I could not deal with this so I had to get out of there asap. But at the same time I had to find a way to get this damn dish off my nuts. Then it dawned on me. There was a car wash down the street. So I made the trip down...
Then I woke up in a cold sweat. It was 2:30am and I was fine. No frozen balls or butter dish. It was all a dream (nightmare). This damn Q and A is now comming to me in my dreams. The moral of the story is. People who tell you this kinda stuff have no idea what they are talking about.
Okay, so maybe I stretched the truth about the apple. I really used a couple grapes. Uh.... pea's.
