I consider training and staying in shape to be more about holding onto my youth, feeling younger. I used to train exclusively to be the best bodybuilder I could be, but after realizing that I was not going to win a pro card any time soon—and the fact that I was getting old faster than I had realized—my motivation switched quite a bit. I still train very hard, but I want people to consider me younger than I am — an honest admission. Does it work? Am I fooling people? Probably not. I feel younger, but that, my friends, is where our perceptions can sometimes get skewed quite quickly.
Feeling young and looking young are two entirely separate things. If I don’t look in a mirror I feel like I am thirty on most days, maybe younger. The leaner I get, the tighter my skin gets, and the smaller my stomach gets, the younger I feel I look. Problem is, that does not equate to everyone else thinking I am younger. No matter how good of shape I am in, my ass is still considered old.
Okay, not by someone my age, but that doesn’t count. If you want the truth, you won’t get it. If you ask a 20-something year old they aren’t going to tell you, “Yeah, you’re old." You have to kind of read between the lines.
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Ever see someone half your size and half your age get props about how huge they are or how ripped they are? While you stand there arrogantly smirking to yourself thinking, “You just haven’t noticed me yet."
What you are missing is that YOUNG is hot. Even though you might carry more muscle and possibly be even leaner than the young guy, no one gives a shit because your look doesn’t have the appeal of the younger guy. Why? YOU ARE OLD, and old people aren’t considered hot by anyone younger than they are. Understand that old and young has nothing to do with muscle or strength, but rather your skin, your face, your larger midsection, etc.
Even while in great shape, your skin and your face gives your age away most of the time. And have you ever seen an older bodybuilder with a small waist? It isn’t common. Most of us have larger midsections that are blocky or have that bloated/distended look even while lean. That is age, and it has you slippin’ in the hotness polls — big time.
I had a really good night the other night at the gym. One guy asked me if I was getting ready for a show, and I appreciated that; I was flattered. I took it at face value in that he noticed I had more muscle than a regular guy in the gym and was leaner than most guys in the gym.
Some would have walked away with the idea that this guy wished he looked like me, but trust me, he didn’t. He was probably 25 or so, not in very good condition, and no one would have thought he worked out if they saw him walking down the street. Still, I am smart enough to know he would not want to be 46-years old with my physique. He was just being nice and acknowledging me and possibly my work ethic. I thanked him for that.
As older guys that have been around a long time and have been noticed for our physiques for years—sometimes decades—we need to be fair and honest with ourselves and admit we are old and have passed the stage of being considered hot by anyone that isn’t...well, old like us. If you think that people who are out of shape that you went to school with are going to drool over you at the class reunion, you are delusional. Other than the novelty of you looking “different” (notice I didn’t say hot) than everyone else, you are simply the old guy that works out and has muscles. No one is dropping fat-girl panties at the 30-year class reunion because they are a bodybuilder, and you arguing otherwise does not make it true.
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If you aren’t convinced yet, there is one last test: your wife or girlfriend (but only if you have a relationship where you are honest with each other). I did this to my wife and knew what her response would be before I even asked her. We were in the gym the other night and I was careful to pick out a good looking kid of about 26 that was more of an athletic look than a bodybuilder — small waist, lean, but not ripped and not a ton of muscle, just enough that you would notice his upper body in a shirt.
I asked my wife point blank: If you had the opportunity to see that kid naked and I would never know about it, would you do it? She immediately scowled at me so I thought maybe I had crashed and burned until she blurted out, with the scowl still on her face, “Are you kidding me? I would destroy that and then call him the next day and tell him we’re doing it again."
I wasn’t sure whether I was glad I made my point or bothered by her response.
Just Sayin'.
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