I have a confession.
If no one could tell from my training updates, since the Arnold at the beginning of the year I have had a significant drop-off from powerlifting. This isn't due to a lack of love for the sport, but largely due to repetitive injuries and circumstances. I took a big hit financially having to start again from scratch, my schedule changed, my job changed, and my back was a mess. From lack of funding I really haven't been able to afford seeing a chiropractor once a week, but I am in need of a weekly adjustment if I want to continue powerlifting long-term. Getting to the gym regularly and being able to dedicate my usual time also became challenging. Suddenly I was taking care of everything else in my life, and powerlifting unfortunately got put on the backburner.
That being said, I have been getting asked when I would be back, or when my next meet was. To be completely honest with myself and with others, I do not have a definitive answer for that. The benefit a new sport has had on me physically and mentally has been tremendous. At the end of the day, we must do what we know is best for us.
I developed a strong love for jiujitsu since the beginning of the year. I know I talk about that a lot. But it has truly changed my life in many ways. I am actually very excited for the idea that I will have opportunities to compete next year when coach says I am ready. It is different though.
By far the most difficult thing about jiujitsu is the lack of instant reward. There are no PR's. There is no immediate gratification. Actually, there are far more "failings" in BJJ than you would ever get in powerlifting. But when you can turn those losses into lessons every time, you improve. You just come in, work hard, and aim to suck a little less every day.
I am very grateful to my training partners and most of all to my incredible coach. He pushes me hard. Really hard. And this is exactly what I needed to get my head straight. Powerlifting was a good mental boost, but it was driven by the wrong motives and began in a dark place for me. I look at my transition into jiujitsu as a symbol of change in my life. The day I stepped on the mat is the day I became a new person.
I know that since I have made the choice to take a break from powerlifting I have received some scrutiny from within the community. But please understand that I have actually found my happiness! I enjoy giving back to the sport by coaching and aiding with mobility programs. I am happy to pass on whatever knowledge I have to others, because I would love to see them succeed.
I think one day I will return. For now you can expect to see regular updates of my journey to turn myself into a conditoning and grappling machine. Always a powerlifter at heart. I am grateful for everything this sport has given me.
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