Did you ever take a good look at the shape of the
Prowler? How about someone giving you the finger? Did you ever take a good look at their hand? When you look down at the Prowler right before you begin to engage your entire body and will to push it, you can see the metal manifestation of someone giving you the finger.
You can see the triangular shape of the hand like a finger constellation in the sky, only this one is right in front of your face. Just sitting there it challenges you—“Come on. What have you got in the tank today?” If you’ve pushed it, you know what I mean.
Did you see how high those poles go when you look at it from afar as it sits there waiting? Those are two middle fingers, a double fisted insult to your stature as an athlete, and they can hold a God load of weight. It just rips you in the ego to have all that space above the one or two plates on each side. If it doesn’t, it should.
The Prowler is about attitude and willpower. It’s one of those intersection points like the drinking fountain where powerlifters, bodybuilders, and cardio freaks seem to gather and agree—this sucks; let’s do more. It’s a tightly contained mountain ready for the climbing. I’m sure its sketched design could be found somewhere in da Vinci’s papers indexed under torture devices. It’s a work of art worthy of a cult following. They ought to have the Prowler push at the Olympic Games.
The Prowler is the only piece of equipment you eat. You chew it up, gnashing your teeth against the metal and breaking it up into little pieces that you choke down. These are “nanoProwlers.” They make their way into your blood, spreading to your legs, tearing up the muscles in your calves, in your quads, and in your hams. A whole battalion of them sit in your gut pushing up whatever you ate that day, relentlessly pushing until a weak moment when they win and you retch. There’s a bunch that make their way to your lungs, usually by trip three or four, and block the incoming air. Gremlins in the machine.
Each time you chew it up you get stronger. You can withstand more “nanoProwlers.” Your body uses the metal from their dead carcasses as cabling in your muscle fiber. You add more weight, you add more trips, you decrease your rest periods, and you improve as an athlete. Your will gets more powerful and you improve as a person. You become an unstoppable force who’s pushed the devil’s toy around, eaten it, and gotten stronger, faster, tougher, and more intense. The Prowler is waiting for you. The Prowler uber alles.
