Yeah so that heading is complete bait ... not because it was a lie, that is actually what I was suppose to do, but because I failed miserably as an athlete this day on many fronts which cost me an unknown amount of training days to be scrapped.

I came into this session with the wrong mindset, ill be honest, Ive been coming into training the last 2 weeks with the wrong mindset. There was no intent, no purpose, I was not having fun nor did I feel like I was working towards my goal. So this day was a numb feeling of going through the motions which I HATE! It did not take long for those thoughts to infect my training and decisions. I got to the point where I wanted to get my heavy set over and hit the number I had in my head (which was too heavy) for 8. The bar was loaded and I walked up to it, I un-racked the weight and knew I was in for a rough ride, I had a light wrap on so I figured I would make it through. Rep number 4 came and my thought was, "your only half way there, good luck" hit number 5 and when I stood up I had one side of my brain saying, rack it and the other saying you came this far you may as well. I attempted to take 580 for 8, I did not make it back up on 6, I fell short, to add to it my bicep pain was so intense I was unable to flex my arm. So much for bench, so much for the rest of the workout.

We hear many of the greats talk about auto regulation, I am far from great, far from even good (in my eyes) so this skill I have not learned yet. It was learned today by way of force through injury, so as I drove home licking my wounds I was able to sit pissed off and see all the things I did wrong and I will name them with single words:

Mental Fear Lies Ego Decisions

I had was negative in all of these areas and when reflecting on it I sat and just laughed at myself. I hear it and see it implemented with such success yet when the time comes for me to implement it I fail to do so, this hopefully will be the lesson that sticks. The bicep pain is still hurting 2 days later and has cost me going on three bench sessions for a lift I need the most amount of help on. LEARNED, now all I can do is hopefully PASS ON, don't be me.

Christian Anto
Tagged: Training Log
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